Vagineer
Vagineer is a famous GMod Monster that appears in many Gmod machinimas. He resembles an Engineer from Team Fortress 2, but his lower jaw has been stretched downward to the point of resembling female vulva. He was created by YouTube user J16FOX, but has been made famous by other users, such as Mssnor. Even if Vagineer is a very famous (if not even the most famous) Gmod Monster, he doesen't have an official theme song. A couple of people have tried to remedy this with varying degrees of success, but none are as yet officially recognized. Bio Vagineers are a very mysterious variety of Gmod Monsters. They can only speak backwards, with a few exceptions like "Cream gravy!", and they are typically ill mannered toward others. Most Vagineers devour and kill people violently and horribly, but sometimes they are friendly and docile. Some have been known to lend a helping hand in times of need, but they are easily offended and do not take lightly to insults. Origins Vagineers are possibly from another universe entirely. They have been known to distort reality to their liking; often they use this ability to turn victims into "Vagi" versions of themselves. They have been known to interact with other Gmod Monsters, and have been able to summon creatures such as the Snyphurr. There is also a theory which says that the vagineer is the result of a sort of virus or parasite called "Vagineerus Hamalus". Theory 1 Some believe that vagineers were created when a newbie RED engineer on Goldrush was forced to listen to someone micspamming Justin Bieber. Being a newbie with out a mic, and lacking anyone helpful on the server, the engie did not know how to mute a particular player. Prolonged exposure to the effeminate tones of Bieber causes increased estrogen production in whoever listens to them. This particular engineer was affected by this in such a way that his mouth distorted into a vulvic shape. The flawed logic of the micspammer disrupted the engie's reality, making him speak in reverse. This also gave him his unusual powers. The newly created Vagineer went insane, devouring the micspammer and anyone else in his way. Theory 2 It is also possible that Vagineers were created as a direct result of Half-Life's Resonance Cascade. The dimensional rift created at Black Mesa affected the Team Fortress 2 Universe as well as Xen, but not in such a violent manner. The laws of physics and logic are much different in TF2 than Half-Life (much more than Xen), and the dimenional breach directly affected a group of unfortunate Engineers. The difference in physics and logic between the two universes caused a "Logical Reflux" that disrupted the engineers' state of being, causing their mouths to stretch downwards and giving them their present powers and backwards speech. Theory 3 Vagineer was a normal BLU Engineer, when a Spies Sapper is lodged in his "crotch". Then the other Spy had to go Engispy to save him, destroying the Sapper, but Engineer screamed so '' loud that his mouth ended up being stretched into a vulvic shape. The explosion also rendered him insane and a craving for human flesh. And... Click here for another Spy-caused Theory... Variations Vagineers have been seen in many different varieties, some of which might be different species entirely. These include: vagineer: the documentary *The RED Vagineer: the typical, bloodthirsty and erratic variety. See The RED Vagineer *The BLU Vagineer: despite being less aggressive than the RED Vagineer, they are often shown as one of the strongest varieties, displaying dangerously powerful attacks and impressive agility. At least one has Snyphurr as his "minion" of sorts, whom he can summon with Jarate's Bugle. See The BLU Vagineer *The GRN Vagineer: highly offensive with his giant fist but slow to attack (In The Polite Spy part 5 his first appearance). another video with green vagineer in it *Vagiminor/YLW Vagineer: A Vagineer that uses a pickaxe and a hat that shoots out plasma balls to stick his victims to the ground. See The Yellow Vagineer *Vagiboss: a bigger and powerful version of the Vagineer that uses a Socket Wrench as his weapon. See The Vagiboss *Addineer: a hatless RED Vagineer that uses a Gunslinger. *The Googly Eyed Vagineer: a subspecies that is comical, fun-loving and friendly but can give someone bad luck for the rest of their life by pointing his finger at the victim. Mssnor was one of this type. *The Goggle-less Vagineer/Vagistaregineer: the most intelligent variety as well as the most dangerous and rarest. Oddly, it is also is the most friendly, having an uncanny desire to help others. *The Engina: a large, stationary, hive-minded Vagineer that inhabits desert regions. *The Scorpion Vagineer/Vagisnail: a species that has venomous tails and serves the Engina. *V4G1N33R: a robotic version of Vagineer. *Vagitrollgineer: commonly seen in the form of a normal RED or BLU engineer that starts trolling like the Trollcitizen when he reveals his true Vagineer form. He was first shown Engineer Describes Rarity. *Half-Vagineer: a form of Vagineer whose vagina-mouth hasn't fully-developed yet. Though he can speak backwards, he lacks the ability to shoot off limbs and spit white liquid. Greatly resembles Erection Pie and PornCakes. *Scunt : the "Vagi" version of Scout *Heavagina: the "Vagi" version of Heavy. Very powerful, but lacking in the intelligence department. *Spenis: the "Vagi" version of the Spy. A discreet but arrogant assassin utilizing the powers of both the Vagineer and the regular Spy. *Demogina/Demominge: the "Vagi" version of the Demoman. *Soldong: the "Vagi" version of the Soldier. An clinically insane variant that shares many traits with Painis Cupcake. *Snipenor/Snipenis: the "Vagi" version of the Sniper. An expert marksman with the ability to shoot jarate from his mouth at deadly velocity. Also Spenis's arch-rival. *Pynis: the "Vagi" version of the Pyro. One of the most powerful and unpredictable variants. *Scunt's Mom/Vagimama: the "Vagi" version of the Scout's Mother. *Vagiministrator: the "Vagi" version of the Announcer/Administrator. *Vagton Hale: the "Vagi" version of Saxton Hale. *Spagina: the "Vagi" version of the Female Spy. *Vagisolgineer : the "Vagi" version of Solgineer *Vagiaya: the "Vagi" version of Aya Shameimaru from the Touhou Project series. Little is known about her, except she is capable of flight, due to the fact she's part Tengu. *VagiTrance/The Dancing Vagineer: A Vagineer that dances and hypnotizes his victims to dance. See The Dancing Vagineer *Vagiku: the 'Vagi' version of Miku Hatsune of the Vocaloid series. Of course all of these variations aside from Engina have exceptions: some specimens that behave vastly different from their peers. Abilities ﻿The character has many odd abilities at its disposal. As with faults, Vagineers' abilities vary from individual to individual. *The ability to launch off limbs as grappling hooks or projectiles. *The ability to regurgitate sticky, white fluid resembling whitewash from its mouth. *The ability to mutate a victim into a "Vagi"-faced variation like this. *Limb regeneration. *Counter-attacks. *The BLU Vagineer possesses Jarate's Bugle, allowing him to summon Snyphurr. *Ear Rape growl, which make his victims' heads explode. *High resistance to damage and effects of Gmod monster abilities. *Some Vagineers - rare but not unheard of - can regenerate completely from a sufficient mass, similar to the liver. This could be considered parthenogenesis. Faults The faults and "weaknesses" of a Vagineer vary from individual to individual. Some may have close to none, others may be helplessly handicapped, but all of them share a common inability: they are not immune to detrimental effects caused by the active abilities of other GMod Monsters, such as Snyphurr's stone gaze (in the rare case that Snyphurr attacks Vagineer), the loud screams of Crazy Machine, the paranormal effects of Trolltizen's trollface, or the disabling psychic energy field that surrounds Pygas. The effects of these abilities are only temporary to a Vagineer (or last less time in the case of effects that are temporary as-is) but still serve their purpose. Quotes *''Hurrrrrr! *''Rrrrrruh?'' *''Haimamooo!'' *''Wooooooooooooooo!'' *''Gottam!'' *''Sey kceh!'' *''Epon!'' *''Nocab 'nikam... eeeeeeeewooooooooH!'' *''Yvarg maerc!'' *''Eneri thgindoog, ho!'' *''Yssis, ereh emoc!'' *''Thgir t'nia tsuj taht!'' *''Yob, 'niyarp trats!'' *''Yrtnes ham 'nippas hapS!'' *''Resnepsid ham 'nippas hapS!'' *''Retropelet ham 'nippas hapS!'' *''Resnepsid a 'nitcere!'' *''Cream gravy!'' Trivia *In some videos featuring Vagineer and Painis Cupcake, they fight to death, but in another videos they become friends. They have even been shown "dating" on one occasion. *Some videos feature more docile, even helpful vagineers. *According to teamfortress (YouTube user), Scunt is friends with vagineers. *If a vagineer does not find food for 3 months, he will become a normal engineer again. *In the Versus Saxton Hale Mod Vagineer is one of the Default Monsters. *Vagineers don't always kill or eat their victims. In two videos, Engineer Hates Vagineerand VAGINEER RAPES JUDITH MOSSMAN, they were seen doing unspeakable "things" to Engie's sentries and Judith Mossman. Videos *Vagineer *VAGINEER HAS SOMETHING TO SAY *Everyone Says Vagineer *PAINIS CUPCAKE MEET VAGINEER *TF2 Freak Fight, Painis Cupcake VS Vagineer *Vagineer is hungry *Vagineer is hungry 2 *Vagineer is hungry 3 *Engina *Soldine vs. Vagineer *VAGINEER APOCALYPSE *Vagineer at ctf_turbine *Rise Of The TF2 Monsters Part 1 *Rise Of The TF2 Monsters Part 2 Category:Characters Category:GMod Monsters Category:Villains